check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
