Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize