OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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