Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
