I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
