she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize