I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
