hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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