Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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