are you so shy because you have an std?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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