I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
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she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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