Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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