My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
