I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
