I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
as a side note pls kill me
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
