in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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