It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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