Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
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it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
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he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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