I need help removing her.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
