we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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