Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
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He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
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Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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