Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
