Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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