Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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