wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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