We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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