Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
