so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i will never coherently bang her
I love having hate sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize