Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
