Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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