drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize