She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
