I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
