She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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