***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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