i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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