Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
