Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
