i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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