Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize