I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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