I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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