Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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