Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize