i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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