The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
