you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
