I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
