Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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