we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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