Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
